Wear the Dress

One of the areas of people-pleasing I still struggle with is trusting myself. In fact, it’s one of the intentions I set at the beginning of the year. Even though I worry less about what people think, I still wonder — and that wondering can lead to self-doubt and insecurity.

A few months ago, I bought a vintage dress on a secondhand site that I thought would be perfect for the upcoming May Day celebration at my son’s school. This is an annual cultural event I look forward to every year — a joyful gathering filled with hula and music performed by the entire school.

The dress was a bright turquoise muu muu (my favorite color), made of flowy fabric with a large flower printed on the front and back. It was beautiful, and when I tried it on, I felt pretty.

But as the day approached, I started second-guessing myself.

Is it too colorful?
Do I look like a sack of potatoes?
Is it giving Mrs. Roper vibes?

I knew in my heart I wanted to wear the dress — and if I didn’t wear it to May Day, I wouldn’t wear it anywhere. But my mind kept telling me it was too much. I started looking through my closet for something more “safe.”

Then I remembered my intention: Trust yourself.

So I made a decision. I decided the dress was beautiful, and that was enough for me. I didn’t need anyone else to validate it. I wore the dress.

Later, while I was sitting on the lawn watching the dancers and musicians perform, I had a moment.

My knees were pulled up to my chest, my feet were bare, and my dress and sunhat were protecting me from the sun. I felt the breeze blowing — and something else: joy.

Joy I might have missed if I had let fear of judgment win.

So here’s what I want to say to you:

Wear the dress.
Take the job.
Say no to the invitation.
Accept the date.
Set the boundary.

Trust yourself. You’re allowed to take up space.

If this resonates with you, we might be a good fit to coach together. I invite you to schedule a free consultation call to chat about where you are, where you would like to be and how I can help you get there. I can’t wait to work with you.